


if you like it put a ring on it

by thesorrowoflizards



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: (minor and resolved), Abrupt Ending, Cop Alec, Cop Magnus, Crack, Engagement, Fake Marriage, Fake but not, Fluff and Humor, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Light Angst, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, POV Alec, Pining Alec Lightwood, Pining Magnus Bane, Requited Unrequited Love, Short One Shot, because it's only a plot device in this silly little oneshot, i'm saving the plot juices for the longer one, like they would never use their real names lmao, marriage probably doesn't work like this either, not as silly as i originally intended but not angsty either, really light, suspend belief for some fun, the case they're going undercover for is very vague and meaningless, unrealistic cop procedures, wrote this in like a few hours
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-01
Updated: 2018-09-01
Packaged: 2019-07-05 13:47:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15864840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesorrowoflizards/pseuds/thesorrowoflizards
Summary: "Detective Lightwood, you and Bane are on this case. You're going to have to go undercover.""Sir... this is a marriage retreat?""Yes, you will have to post as a married couple. Is that going to be a problem?"Magnus and Alec looked at each other."No, no, definitely not--""Of course not, we're professionals--"





	if you like it put a ring on it

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Rai_Knightshade](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rai_Knightshade/gifts).



> based on[ this post](https://thesorrowoflizards.tumblr.com/post/177630106286) and sorta [this post](https://thesorrowoflizards.tumblr.com/post/177631564346/ezra-you-gotta-write-that-undercover-cops-au-even)?

 

Alec should have known there was trouble when their captain, Luke Garroway, approached his office with his grinning sister close behind.

Magnus was sitting on his desk with a mug of coffee (he had been telling a wild story about one of his college escapades when the door opened) and Luke entered first, followed by Isabelle.

"Detective Lightwood, you and Bane are on this case now," the captain said, handing them a file folder. A quick glance told Alec it was a corruption case they'd just gotten a break on. Right, Sgt. Herondale had been fired last week, and this had been his case. "We got a break in the case, and we need someone to go undercover."

"Sir..." Magnus said next to him, looking down at the folder, "This is a marriage retreat. How are we...?"

"Yes, you will have to post as a married couple. Is that going to be a problem?"

Magnus and Alec looked at each other.

"No, no, definitely not--"  
"Of course not, we're professionals--"

"Good," Luke said firmly. "You'll be leaving tomorrow. Familiarize yourself further with the case, and work out how you're going to be doing this. Good luck."

He turned and walked back towards his office.

Magnus turned on his heel with a rather dramatic flair, looking at Alec. He was beautiful as always--he was wearing suspenders today, for some godforsaken reason, and he looked amazing. Tight button-up shirt showing off his biceps, suspenders, traces of makeup on his face (some eyeliner and a touch of lip gloss that Alec kind of wanted to taste)... 

"Well?" he said.

Alec blinked. "Uh, sorry," he said. "Right, we should... work on this case. Do we have undercover identities?"

"It's pretty short notice, so we're just using our real names," Magnus said, reading from the file. 

"What if someone background checks us?" Alec asked.

Magnus shrugged. "So we're married cops."

"One problem... we're not married." Alec said.

"I can get together a quick patch cover," Isabelle interjected. "Suspend your police files so they don't show up in the database, patch over a fake job and history... The more time I have, the better it'll be. It wouldn't hold up right away to someone with a lot of resources and know-how, but it'll definitely work on a reverse search or something similarly amateur. And this is a relatively small-time scam, I doubt they'll expend too much energy on you. And of course we'll have backup ready for you."

"Marriage is harder to fake, though," Alec said. "There's a paper trail. They probably do background checks on couples who come in."

"I can fake it."

"Can't risk it," Alec said. "We could just get married."

Magnus startled at the suggestion, giving him an odd look. Isabelle raised an eyebrow. 

"What?" Alec said. 

"...you want to marry Magnus?" Isabelle asked.

"Why not?" Alec said. "We can say we're newly married, we've been together for a while, and we wanted to take a break from our busy lives. Hell, we can work in the cop thing so there's no lies to uncover--we've worked together for a long time, we finally got married, and now we want a break from the stress to be together or... whatever."

He saw the looks they were giving him. " _What?"_ he snapped.

"You've... thought a lot about this?" Magnus asked carefully, his expression unreadable.

"It's a good plan," Alec said, crossing his arms and daring them to argue. "Anyway, I can give you the Lightwood family ring. They'll buy it."

Isabelle nearly choked. "The family ring? Mom will be  _pissed_ if you lose it!"

"It's believable," Alec insisted. 

"You can't give me a family heirloom like that," Magnus said, shifting slightly. "Look, it's fine, we can just--"

"No, we can do this," Alec said. "I'd much rather marry--uh, fake marry, for the job... you, then say... Clary." 

"What's wrong with my girlfriend?" Isabelle asked.

"She's your  _girlfriend,_ " Alec said. "And I'm gay. It's weird. I'm not kissing her for any job."

"There's gonna be kissing?" Isabelle said, eyebrows raising higher. Magnus took a nervous sip of coffee to hide the slight blush tinging his cheeks.

"Well, we might have to sell it!"

"You know this isn't a real marriage, right?"

"Of course I know that," Alec said. "I'm not saying we have to consummate it or something."

Magnus choked on his coffee.

"I'm just saying we'll be undercover," Alec said, absently patting Magnus's back as he coughed. "We've got to sell it and make sure we're not found out." 

"I'm--I'm sure we'll be fine," Magnus said, voice a little hoarse. "You don't have to do all this."

"It's  _fine,_ " Alec said.

"You sure it won't make anything weird?" Magnus asked. "Kissing and... pretending to be a couple?"

"I'm... going to go now," Isabelle said. "I think Clary's calling me,  _bye!"_

Clary was still at home, but neither of them paid the obvious lie any mind. The door clicked shut behind her.

"What do you mean?" Alec asked.

"Well, I... I know I can be a  _lot,"_ Magnus said. "But our friendship means too much for me to... risk it on a dalliance, or for things to get weird between us because of some kissing..." 

"What? No, of course not," Alec said. "It's just... what's a little kissing between friends?"

Magnus laughed a little. "Of course," he said. He sounded a little strained. Suddenly Alec wondered if maybe the reason Magnus was uncomfortable was  _him._ Did he really not want to kiss Alec? Did a fake relationship make him uncomfortable?

"Do you--not want to do this?" Alec asked. "I mean, if you're not comfortable with it, it's fine, I just thought it would be... Ideal, I guess?"

Magnus furrowed his brows. "What do you mean?"

"Well, you're my best friend," Alec said like it was obvious, because it was. "And... well, we could make it believable pretty easily, couldn't we? People have mistaken us as a couple before, because of how much we... touch... and how close we are."

It sounded kind of weird when he said it out loud.

"And anyway," he rushed on, "We're comfortable with each other and obviously I completely trust you to have my back in the field,  _and_ I wouldn't have to fake attraction or affection towards you, because we both know I'm a shit liar."

Magnus blinked. His cheeks looked a little pink. "Flawless reasoning," he said. "One problem, though."

"...What's that?" Alec asked, kind of dreading the answer. 

Magnus shifted from foot to foot. "Do we have to say it out loud?" 

"Well, because I have no idea what we're talking about, yes."

Magnus sighed. "The crush. That we both know about. It's a little cruel to kiss someone who has a crush on you, isn't it?"

Alec froze. Magnus  _knew?_

Fuck.  _Fuck fuck fuckfuckfuck._

And he wasn't even mad! He was just worried about Alec's feelings! Fuck! Why was he so pure and good?!

"Did you really not know?" Magnus asked softly. He looked oddly vulnerable.

"That you knew? No," Alec said. "But--look... this has... this has nothing to do with that." He was stuttering now, tripping miserably over his own words. "It's just... It's just a good idea! We don't even have to kiss, I won't touch you if it makes you uncomfortable--" realizing his hand was still on Magnus's back and had been this whole time, he jerked it away like he'd been burned. "Sorry."

Magnus gave him a stupefied look. "I'm not asking you to stop touching me," he said. "Unless you just feel uncomfortable doing so, knowing... wait, what do you mean  _you didn't know I knew?_ "

"How was I supposed to?" Alec asked. 

"It was my crush!" Magnus cried, setting his coffee down with a clatter, then looked like he immediately regretted it when Alec gave him a wide-eyed look.

"No it wasn't," Alec said, voice higher with a slight note of hysteria. "It was  _my_ crush. I thought you were uncomfortable because you--wait, you have a crush on  _me?"_

"I could ask the same of you!"

"Is that a yes?"

"...yes," Magnus admitted. "Of course it is. I thought... I thought you knew. I didn't think you minded, but..." 

"I didn't know," Alec said.

"Well. Yes. I see that now." 

There was a moment of silence where they just stared at each other. 

"Can I kiss you?" Alec blurted out.

"Please do," said Magnus immediately, already leaning forward. 

They met in the middle, Alec's hand cupping his face and Magnus's fluttering at Alec's sides, unsure where to put them.

It was...  _amazing_ wasn't a good enough word for it. Words couldn't describe it, not properly--it was warm and soft and there was a feeling he couldn't quite put his finger on... something like  _yes. finally. here it is._

The moment--the beautiful, sparkling moment where time slowed down and everything was perfect--was thoroughly shattered by some muffled cheers and good-natured heckling.

They broke apart, looking back towards the door. The glass door, with windows next to it, and all the blinds and curtains open.

Pretty much the entire precinct was staring at them. They all looked immensely happy--particularly Isabelle, who was beaming and seemed to have taken a picture (Alec would be bugging her for that later). 

And their captain, who was right outside the door, looking at them with a raised eyebrow.

He opened the door, poking his head in. "You two practicing for your undercover work?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.

Everyone knew they weren't practicing. Even if they couldn't hear their conversation, it had been pretty clear from their body language this had been a getting together moment.

"Um," Alec said, clearing his throat.

"Yes?" Magnus said weakly.

"Good," Luke said. "Just don't practice too much until you've left my precinct."

He was clearly teasing them.  _Damn it, Izzy._

They both mumbled something along the lines of  _Of course, sir._

He chuckled a little. As he went to close the door, he paused. "I'm happy for you two," he said sincerely. "But maybe shut the blinds next time."

He left. They shut the blinds and locked the door, ignoring the  _ooooh_ s from outside and the barked  _alright, show's over, get back to work everyone,_ from Luke, and even the muffled murmurs from outside that Alec could  _swear_ mentioned a betting pool.

"So... we have some things to talk about?" Magnus said, biting his lip and looking down.

"Yeah," Alec agreed. "We're kind of doing this in the wrong order, aren't we? Moving in together, engagement, first kiss, marriage, first date?" 

Magnus cracked a smile at that. "It's fun, though," he said. "So... we are getting married then?"

"For the case," Alec said.

"Of course," Magnus said, nodding sagely. "And are we getting divorced afterwards?"

Alec shrugged. "Well, we're already roommates, best friends, and--" he glanced over at Magnus, voice going a little higher, "Newly boyfriends? Honestly, if for no other reason, we could stay married for tax reasons and the like. Plus, Mom would finally get off my back about getting married and settling down."

"I have always wanted to get married," Magnus mused. "I never thought it would happen."

"We could always renew our vows if we... if we get that far," Alec said. "Or... divorce. If we have to."

"True," Magnus said.

They looked at each other again. _God, Magnus is beautiful,_ Alec thought.

"We could talk about this," Magnus said. "Right now."

"We could talk about the case," Alec said.

They both came to a silent understanding.

"So we should make out?" Alec asked. 

"Definitely," Magnus said. "Talking? Pft. It can wait. I'd rather make up for lost time."

"We can start on that," breathed Alec, and he leaned forward and captured Magnus's lips in a kiss again, arms wrapping around him.

Magnus kissed back, just as eager as he was. 

"We're technically fiancés now, aren't we?" Alec mumbled between kisses.

"Mm... yes," Magnus said. "I thought we weren't talking..."

"Don't have to," Alec said, pulling away slightly. "Just... we're technically engaged now."

Magnus beamed at him. "I suppose we are," he said. "Fiancé." 

Alec grinned back. "Fiancé," he said. "I do love the sound of that." 

And he leaned forward to kiss Magnus again.

**Author's Note:**

> i'll probably be writing a longer oneshot that's proper "going undercover as a married couple" with all the tropes but this is a silly oneshot to tide y'all over lol


End file.
